Saturday, February 28, 2009


What lies in the end upon a man's life and fear?
Is "Death"
Many of us here are afraid of death.
It is not the process that is fearful only.
The meaning of death also means the erase of existence.
Its what most of us mainly fear of.
I want to die in the coolest way or die protecting.

I been think i almost experience death twice.
1) When i was five years old,
Had an accident, but was send to my grandma house instead of a hospital cause the driver doesn't want to be held responsible. But i don't blame him. Its not like anyone want this to happen, rite? As soon as a kind man with his car pass through us, he took me and my grandma to the hospital. I couldn't make it in time. When i was in the icu(intensive care unit), the doctors told my family to prepare for the worse cause ten out of ten cases like this ends up dead. Luckily there was this doctor from india who was willing to treat me although there was no hope left in me.
I want to thank her. Mean while, I had a dream, I was in heaven i guess with all those clouds and a big gate. Opens and welcome me. As i enter the gate, it turn out to be a black and white world in a room. i saw a figure siting on a rocking chair. It was then i notice that it was my grandpa who had died long ago. He told me to go back from where i came from and i don't belong to this(black n white) world. Then after having a coma 4 bout almost 3weeks, I woke up. But i couldn't talk properly, had double vision, couldn't walk, and many more. After two years, I had fully recover.

2) It was when i was 15, it was a stormy night, at around 1am, my chest starts to feel pain and cram. It was getting hard to breath. And i pass out on my bed. Maybe it was a dream or it was real, cause the next thing i know is that i was in heaven again or so. There i saw a figure, a holy one, which i couldn't see his face. It was as though as it was erase from my memory. I think it was god(i'm not sure if his christian, islam, or buddha, k?). He then pass me a handphone(old one) and told me that i had died that very night. He said that i can make use this phone to call the one person i to say goodbye to. He said only one. Then i ask if i were to sms, will i able to sms(text) to many people instead of calling only one. He then answer no.
I took a look at the phone and search for a name. i was amaze cause everybody in the world's name is in the contact list. I ask god if i could actually purchase it. He than say that its not for sale. As i was thinking of who should i call, I kept thinking and thinking. i miss everybody. It was then when, i know who should i call.
Before i make the call, god ask me to sign on something like a contract which has my details on it. Then, i suddenly realize something wrong about it. I wasn't born in 1960. It was written wrongly. I then ask god about it. He then laugh, and said that "opps, wrong person". He said that i can go back. Then here am i. The weirdest part is where i can't recall his face or i actually could not even see it.

Death is no longer a fear to me, cause I am enjoying my life. Die a happy death if i could..hahax..
erm..., if i had offended some people, then i am sorry.

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